<h4>A New Positive Aspect to Service...Who Knew?</h4>

I have always been told that service will change your demeanor in a positive way.  I always figured that your mood changed because of the effect that you had on someone's life from the service you gave.  While I still believe that this is true, I have started to realize that there is a more subtle effect that is just as positive.

I was helping my grandfather install his computer today.  It was very frustrating to have the elderly telling you things that 1) aren't necessarily true and 2) things that will not be of any help in the situation.  

It started with not being able to find the cables necessary for running power to all of the components...and that alone took several minutes of tearing the house apart.  After finding the cables I rewarded myself to a shower...a nice, warm, relaxing shower.  Following the opening of the bathroom door after I dressed myself, however, I was greeted with a wonderful "the internet isn't working!"  Awesome.  That is the only word that came to mind and it was in a very sarcastic manner.

I went to investigate the situation.  I figured that I just needed to configure the wireless network settings...and of course things are never that easy.  After some time I was able to confidently say that the computer did not have the required drivers installed to support wireless connectivity.  Again, awesome.  Realizing what I had to do, I went downstairs and completely unhooked the entire wireless network setup and migrated the mass of modems, routers, and cables upstairs towards the computer room from hell (or at least it was at that moment in time).

I started to set up a wired connection to the computer and then realized that we didn't have the correct network cable.  I was again forced to tear the house apart in search for one cable two feet in length.  I finally found it and promptly plugged it in to finish the job and stop my profuse profanity brought upon by my pure frustration. 

I finished the job.  I was annoyed.  I was irritable.  I wanted to be left alone with music playing and some sort of food calming my hungry stomach.  So, wanting some "relaxation" time, I took my brother to see a movie.  It was exactly what I needed to calm down.

When I returned it was time for dinner.  My grandmother had cooked some hamburgers and as we sat down to eat everyone left in all of the directions that life was taking them (scouts, young women's, work, etc).  I of course was left with the grandparents.  To my surprise, however, I was in a wonderful mood.  I was not angry, I was not stressed, I was actually calm and peaceful.  I was participating in conversation and actually enjoying it.  My grandfather then knocked over his drink and without even thinking I rushed and cleaned the entire spill up.  Where did that come from?

I confused myself.  Seriously.  I usually keep my distance from my grandparents due to certain beliefs that they have concerning my disorder, but I was completely enthralled in the moment.  After leaving the table perplexed I rushed to my guitar to contemplate what just happened.  What changed throughout my day to affect my entire demeanor?  Service?

I hate to say it, but I didn't install the computer for my grandparents.  I installed it because they wouldn't leave me alone until I did.  I was completely selfish due to the fact that I couldn't sense any gratitude for my efforts.  Selfishness, no matter how you justify it, however, is still known as being selfish.  

Playing my guitar allowed me to think clearly.  After playing several chord progressions a thought hit me...how did the service affect me?  If I didn't do it for the satisfaction of knowing I helped someone else, then how did it change my perception?

Service for others isn't always service for others.  Although they will be left with the physical rewards, the provider of service reaps mental rewards.  No matter the reasons for service, you will uplift your day.  The reason for this is simple - for a small amount of time you are able to reflect on others and their lives...their troubles...their tribulations.  You never have to carry the weight of these burdens, but where most people think that the reward is in knowing that you helped someone in need, the real reward is in knowing that you helped you when you were in need.

Today I was frustrated.  I have a lot on my plate with my current living arrangements, school, dating, work, and who knows what else.   I was stressed, on edge, irritable.  While I worked on my grandfather's troubles, however, it gave me time to reflect on my life.  When you aren't focusing on your life and stressing about what needs to be done, you open your mind to answers and solutions to your problems that you were unable to see because you were too involved, or close, to the situation.  

Sure, I fixed a computer and made my grandfather very happy.  More importantly, however, I freed my mind to find answers and come to a peace of mind with the problems at hand in my life.  When did service for others mean service for you?  Who knew?